A magical land of wonder and arse pinching…
Posts Tagged ‘Countries’
Tricky one this, a minefield of sensitive stereotypes and historical baggage.
Oh shit – I said minefield…
The only country in the world where the bowler hat is still considered fashionable, the Carry On films hip and cool and calling women “love” or “darling” still socially acceptable.
The really cold one above and a bit the the left of Canada where everyone is constantly drunk on tequila from a bottle with some blokes toe in it.
The one above the USA. This is, in fact, where all the Americans are born. First they learn the basics by practising not saying please or thank you. Next they they learn to shoot things, execute people and drive pickup trucks. A quick course in “How to Increase Your Carbon Footprint” and “How not to Run a Banking System” and they’re ready to roll across the border.
Mexico is the the cute warm little country below the USA. It has really cool bullet ridden mud houses. The main import for Mexico is fugitives and main exports are domestic staff and donkeys.
The bit above Mexico but below Canada. The main difference between Canada and the USA is that more male citizens of the USA have had sex with an animal than have a passport.
- GAI GOR DON – a deep fried Mars bar accompanied by bagpipes and dancing.
- KAO PAD GUM – a delicious deep fried cow pat garnished with well chewed bubblegum (which should still be warm and moist).
- PED RON – Thai version of a Mexcican dish from the East end of London.
- LAB GAI YANG – A little known character from CSI New York
- PLA YANG BAI THONG – The adjustments women have to make to their underwear.
- GAI YANG TA-KRAI – The moment just before Bambi’s Mum gets killed.
- GOONG PAOW – Any of the movie moments where a bad guy gets blown up.
- GOONG YAI SAUCE MA-KHAM – The bad guy blows up and you get goo on the camera lens.
- CHU-CHI GOONG – The cute bad guy who gets killed last or get’s away.
- GOONG PHAD NAM PRIK-PAOW – You can fill in the blanks on this one, eh?
- PLA TORD SA-MOON PRAI-THAI – Sorry I pasted this in from a Sci-Fi website.
- PAD KHING – An annoying man in eather trousers who has a flat with romantic music and auto dimming lights.
